The "Wait" Poem

by Russell Kelfer
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate...
and the Master so gently said,"Wait."

"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!"
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.

My future and all to which I relate
hangs in the balance and you tell me to Wait?"
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign.
Or even a 'no,' to which I'll resign.

You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply.

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
as my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
and grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting...for what?"

He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine...
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.

I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.

You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
you'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
when darkness and silence are all you can see.

You'd never experience the fullness of love
when the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

The glow of My comfort late into the night,
the faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.

You'd never know should your pain quickly flee,
what it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
but oh, the loss if I lost what I'm doing in you.

So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still "WAIT".

In Response to "Spiritual Warfare"

A blogging friend of mine wrote last week about Spiritual Warfare, and how her family has seen the influence of Satan (the Adversary, Lucifer, whatever you call him) in their children's (and therefore their own) lives. She relates some experiences specific to an adopted daughter, and I am writing my response from the reference point of an adoptive parent. Believe or don't believe, that's your choice. You don't live my life and I do not live yours. I believe because we have been and are still engaged in a war. Our battles have been more subtle but just as persistent. It does wear you down after a while, even people like me who consider(ed) themselves very spiritually strong. This was my response to her post, for those who may not read that blog. I did not want to link directly, simply because I would hate for one of my thousands of six readers to go over there and leave negative comments for my friend. I will share the link privately if you email me. If you feel like leaving comments here for me, go right ahead. I have on my big-girl pants.

I will say that, in our personal and recent experience, spiritual warfare is very real. It takes different forms and affects us all in different ways, but it is REAL. It doesn't stop when the kids come home, either. If anything I believe Satan then works extra hard to make adoptive parents feel inadequate, unprepared, frustrated and incompetent. Some of us begin to wonder whether we have indeed done the right thing in bringing a child into our family. We ask ourselves daily WHY our child carries such burdens on her tiny shoulders. And he puts plenty of other people into our lives to reinforce these negative ideas, some within our own families. He makes adoption difficult, every step of the way, to give us opportunities to fear and doubt.
 
It must chap his fiery hide TO NO END to see an orphan find a forever family, where she will be cherished, fed and nurtured. It has to drive him berserk to see us work tirelessly to get our kids the services or therapies or medical treatment that will save their physical bodies AND their spirits. Because then we win, and he loses! I do not believe that Satan can force his will upon us, but we can certainly let him in! Little by little we can submit our will and lose our faith and Satan will always be there to welcome us into his fold. He would LOVE to see us fall.
 
For this very reason, we must surround ourselves with people who will lift us up, in prayer and in support and with their heartfelt encouragement. Anybody else just has no place in our life anymore. It takes every ounce of faith and energy to keep our family together, safe in the physical and spiritual sense. There is no room for the negative, the doubters, the discouragers. It is HARD enough, even with the best support network. Yes, indeed, it is a war and we're winning. So far.