Please read carefully. Memorize these words. Follow them. Do not ask questions.
If your friend, cousin or brother tells you to climb onto a metal shelf in the garage then jump off, do NOT do it. Especially if your loose t-shirt may get caught on the shelf and flip you upside down when you jump. Yes, you do know better.
Garage floor+head=5 staples IN your head. Very painful and not at all impressive to the ladies, especially your Mom or your friend's Mom.
If your Dad tells you that chicks dig scars, he is just trying to cover up for his own clumsy childhood. What chicks really dig is a boy who uses his head, and not for breaking concrete. It is definitely not awesome to hear the words "CT scan" or "cervical collar" in the middle of the night. Girls also think it is cool when you listen to your Mom, your friend's Mom, your Aunt, your Grandma and any other female who attempts to ruin your life by making rules and doing all those things that you consider "lame." Yes, we were all put on this Earth to "harsh your deal" and we enjoy it because it seriously harshes our deal to have to drive you to the hospital while keeping you from passing out. I just saw you roll your eyes. That isn't cool either.
Trust me on this one, guys.
My Two Erics
9 years ago
3 comments:
OH MY GOSH!!! My eyes bugged out of my head when I saw "5 staples in the head". I'm so sorry for the one who thought this would be fun. I bet he learned his lesson on that one. I see kids with lacerations at work a lot, but my own kids bleeding gives me the willies. You must have flipped! I'm praying for quick healing!
--Becky
Rick just told me about this last night! Holy cow. He's okay right?
sunday i was introducing myself to the new family who moved into the bensons house and warned them to stay away from the parkinson...jon was standing next to me and agreed because kids get hurt as his house.
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