The Knot and The Promise

I don't have much to say, just hanging onto that knot at the end of my rope. But I saw this on another Ghana family's blog, and it felt just right for today:
Hebrews Chapter 10:
35 Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward.
36 For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.

In FHE tonight we talked about Trust and Faith, and how our faith in Jesus Christ allows us to do things. J taught that trust causes us to act. We talked about how people can fail us and break our trust, but our Lord will never fail us. His plan for us is divine and perfect and we follow it because we trust Him. And so we wait another day and we hang onto the picture we've had in our minds for 7 months now of a little girl with a huge smile and tiny braids. He put it there and has made that image a reality that we have seen with our own eyes and held in our arms. We WILL "receive the promise."

Sappy Thursday

This is long, but (prepare for cheesiness) it has changed the way I parent all of my children. Not long after this song became popular, Steven Curtis Chapman lost his youngest daughter in a tragic accident. So we now dance whenever we can, and the world can wait. Today I am playing with the Princess because she invited me, and because she makes the whole crazy impatient business of the world and our adoption fade into the background. The dishes, the laundry, the room I need to finish painting, they don't spin around and giggle. I swear, her laughter is magical. I dare anyone to listen to it and not feel better than before. The boys grow up just as fast, and their moments of needing us (at least admitting it) grow farther apart and become that much more precious. I'm talking to myself as much as to you, Don't Miss those quick glimpses back to their little-boy selves who loved to sit on your lap and be tucked into bed at night. They are still there if you look. Just take a minute today to appreciate your children. Tell them how much you love them, and why. They drive us crazy, they break things, they whine and they argue and they roll their eyes. But they love us and they want to know that we love them. So say it and DO it.

Tender Mercies

The weekend was filled with wonderful moments. To list just a few: I heard from a family who is making it possible for me to keep a promise made to a special little girl. I watched my oldest handle a major disappointment first like a boy and then like a young man. I saw my little cheerleader rope her brother into cheering with her at the game, and I suspect he enjoyed it. There was a great deal of laughter from the whole group. I got to teach ALL of my fantastic 10 year old friends in Primary, and again learned more than I taught. I have to give a "shout out" to the boys who sit behind us (they know who they are), for again looking out for their brother and acting like they didn't know what I was talking about when I thanked them. I saw a new gappy smile from my youngest son. As if he wasn't cute enough already.
I want to apologize for my rebellious attitude and foot-stomping and yes, prayer made all of the difference. Sometimes the blessings and the comfort are just waiting for us to be humble enough to ask for them. Often, we do not choose humility. Instead, we are beaten down by our trials until we accept it.

Learning Patience

AND NOT BY CHOICE!!

Today the difference between 30 days and 30 business days is glaringly obvious. No word from Ghana, no plans to bring Little Sister home except the ones in my mind. Today I feel very very deserted and very very tired. Just wrung out and incapable of dealing with anything but the basics. Yes, I know I should spend some time on my knees pleading with the One who can make it right, but if we're being real today I don't wanna do it! Trying to contact anyone who may have answers has been fruitless, and I'm so ornery that even the dog doesn't want to be around me. Yes, I would like some cheese to go with my whine. And make it snappy.

Are You Ready For Some Football??

Bugs is playing his first season of tackle football. That is him on the end, #12 in purple. Suddenly we spend a great deal of time at the field watching him practice, and part of every Saturday yelling ourselves hoarse. The first few times I heard them cracking their helmets and pads together, I nearly yanked him off the field and drove right home. He is bruised, sweaty and filthy every single afternoon and doubly so after a game. And he walks off the field with a HUGE smile. So we go back. And we cheer. We paint our car windows with all manner of obnoxious team spirit on Saturday morning and we leave it there during the week because it really bugs his friends and cousins who play for other teams. We have become a football family. Everyone has their game-day gear that we wear proudly. Elena cheers for her brother and his team, and they all love to see their families on the sidelines. The "X" on Bugs' helmet means that he is above the weight limit for his age, so he can only play on the offensive or defensive line. Scary as it is, he is smaller than a lot of the other "X-Men" from other teams. Bugs has a game every Saturday until Halloween, then playoffs and a local tournament. If you want to join us and you look good in purple, we're happy to share the schedule with you. If you prefer baseball, watch for Toad in the Spring.

Back to School (yeah, late again)

So, the boys all went back to school the day after J and I came home from Ghana. Grades 1, 3 and 5. Yes, Bugs is almost my size. Wait until you see the football pictures! Toad has already used his big brown eyes on his teacher and Dawg is excited that he is in a different class than his best friend (for the first time) so now they can "totally compete all year long." They begged me not to take their pictures this year, which I ignored just like last year. Apparently the poses I choose are "dorky." So I let them pose themselves, with a promise from all that they would do something normal. Now you see what I deal with on a daily basis. This IS their normal.

P.S. The Toad would like you to know that his pants are zipped in the pictures, the part that covers the zipper just "goes all funky" sometimes.

Write it on your heart

One of my favorite bloggers posted this poem a few days ago. Some recent events make it even more fitting and even more lovely.

Write it on your heart
by Ralph Waldo Emerson

Write it on your heart
that every day is the best day in the year.
He is rich who owns the day, and no one owns the day
who allows it to be invaded with fret and anxiety.

Finish every day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities, no doubt crept in.
Forget them as soon as you can, tomorrow is a new day;
begin it well and serenely, with too high a spirit
to be cumbered with your old nonsense.

This new day is too dear,
with its hopes and invitations,
to waste a moment on the yesterdays.

The Fairy Ticker and a Fairy Princess

A few months ago, the little fairy ticker on the sidebar was annoying me so badly that I took it down for a while. It was depressing to see the number grow larger each day. Each time the count went up by a day, my frustration grew at the total halt brought to our lives while we waited for something, anything to happen. For those of you waiting, those months right in the middle drag by, but they do end eventually. Then there was a sudden flurry of activity and travel and general craziness with school starting for all four kids at home. Now that life is settling down a bit and we are kind of counting down to Little Sister coming home, I'm more able to see those ticker days as a positive. SIX months today. In comparison, our wait has been short, even shorter than our domestic adoption of Bugs. The ticker reminds me that we have had six whole months to rely on faith. Plus, that fairy is darn cute, if you ask me. Little Sister's new room will have PLENTY fairies (to borrow one of her favorite words) for her to enjoy, thanks to the Princess's interior design expertise. Once she realized that one of the fairies (Iridessa) in her favorite Di$n*y movie "has brown skin and tiny braids like Little Sister," she informed us that she knew *just* what to do for the new bedroom. It is going to be beautiful and fun and I think it will really suit our newest fairy princess very well. Her Highness really has a good eye for color, with a slightly disturbing fondness for glitter. She works for goldfish crackers and M&Ms if any of you want to hire her.